Getting Rich!!!

I am fixing to be a millionaire. And it is all legal. I know it is because the non-chain letter I just received in the mail says it is. I will tell you how it works.

Some dummy opens a letter that I send to them requesting they send me and some other people a dollar. When they get my letter they are SURE to send me those dollar bills as they don't know me from Eve. But the letter says it is legal, so why not try.

Once I get the dollar from each of these six dumb people, they will in turn send my letter to other people who don't know them from Adam or Eve and my name will then be on a list from all these folks and these complete dummies will then send my name to all on their list and I am raking in the dough by the handfuls. Yes, it is true! I am fixing to be a millionaire as soon as I make 200 hundred copies of the five-page letter I received and send it to only SIX people. Don't ask me why I would need 200 hundred copies of the letter if I only have to send to six to become wealthy. But the letter says do it, so I reckon that is what I should do. Now, I go buy envelopes and stamps (what does a letter cost to mail these days, anyhow?), replenish my supply of paper, because after 200 copies of a five-page letter I am out and head to the post office.

This is indeed a dream come true. I don't have to stick my head out the door to become filthy rich! Oh, after I get the six dollars, I need $45 to buy peel off address mailing labels which I can order from a place called Data Line. If I want more, I just pay more money. What a DEAL!!! The cost of the envelopes is around $11, paper $55, and $88 for postage. Does this sound like an amazing deal to you!!! That is supposed to be my entire investment before becoming so rich I would be too big for my britches and shun the lowly people around me. (I jest)

And, what is it that makes this NOT a pyramid scam? It is supposedly the way the letter reads. You simply ask the person to add you to their mailing list and all is well and good. And I bet that is going to make more dummies want to send money to me, WHY?

Also it has Oprah Winfrey's name on the letter. That must make it legal. After all, she is the guru of give. Highly respected TV and radio programs say it is legal. (that in itself is an oxymoron - TV X radio, respected??? I think I should call my local Christian station and ask why they are not on board with this.

My first question about this is: HOW did this man, George Cox from Spencerville, Ohio get my name and address!!!! I am on a no-junk mail list at the post office, a no call list on the phone and all my information on the Internet is set at HIGH security.

I do have a plan. I intend to spend a bit of money to mail only ONE letter. I will reuse the address label on the front of the envelope and mail it back to the one that sent it with proper instructions on what he is to do with it.

Yes, I am fixin' on being rich. Why don't each of you that read this just send me a dollar while you are at it and add me to your reading list! Does that make it legal?? I can save all the $205.00 initial investment and probably get about six dollars.